Where To Live

Here are some tips on where you might want to live depending upon what you value in your hometown.

You can live in New York City where…..

1. You say “the city” and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan

2. You can get into a four hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park but can’t find Wisconsin on a map

3. You idea of “nature” is Central Park

4. You think that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multi-lingual

5. You’ve worn out a car horn

6. You think that eye contact is an act of aggression

Or you can live in the Midwest where….

1. You’ve never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name

2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor

3. You’ve had to switch from “heat” to A/C” on the same day

4. You end sentences with a preposition: “Where’s my coat at?”

5. When asked how your trip was to an exotic place, you say, “It was different!”